100 Christmas Songs from Worst to Best

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“If you are on the Internet long enough, there comes a year when you will be forced to rank something. Now it is my time. So I am taking the liberty of going through the 100 holiday songs being foisted upon us everywhere and ranking them from Most Especially Heinous to Best. This is probably a good idea, and I feel fit and confident! I bet this will be an easy, pleasant process. I’m amazed I haven’t already compiled several lists just like this!” — Alexandra Petri, The Washington Post.

In light of the recent kerfuffle over Baby, It’s Cold Outside, Alexandra Petrie’s list is certainly very timely.

You may see songs you have forgotten about or you may see some that you’ve never heard of.

For example, I didn’t know there was a song called “I Farted on Santa’s Lap (Now Christmas Is Gonna Stink For Me).” I’m not sure I needed to learn this!

Feel free to identify your Best & Worst Christmas Songs in the Comments section.

Click on this Link to read Alexandra Petri’s List of Holiday Songs from Worst to Best Holiday Songs:

https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/2018/12/07/ranking-yes-christmas-songs/?utm_term=.cbe61bc27d01&wpisrc=nl_ideas&wpmm=1

Enjoy!

 

 

Conflict to be expected on City Council

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Is it me, or does anyone else see a pattern developing already in reporting on the new city council by the local media? That is to say: Freak out at any sign of discord or disagreement among the Mayor and the councilors.

I’m not sure why this is happening.

Isn’t this type of political conflict to be expected when you gather together 15 individuals, all with their own constituencies and agendas, to make decisions for the common good?

Now, I know Mayor Ed Holder ran on a platform of being the “Great Conciliator” who would be able to bring the 14 Councilors together for a consensus to emerge on decisions which have to be made — some of them being very contentious. But to expect consensus on every issue is naive and just plain silly.

Having run on what for all intents and purposes was an anti-BRT ticket, Holder’s choice of Councilor Jesse Helmer — the BRT Project’s biggest cheerleader — as his Deputy Mayor may at first chance seem odd. But, to be sure, it is a calculated political attempt to bring Helmer into his fold and perhaps burden him with so much work he won’t have time to do a lot of lobbying for the project.

Maybe the local media and Londoners grew too used to the homogeneity of the last council which seemed to march lock-step on most civic issues.

But, as I learned in my first-year Political Science class at UWO way back in the mid-1970s: “Politics is conflict, and the resolution of that conflict.”

Given the differences of opinion on major issues like BRT and supervised injection sites on this new council, I’m sure we can can expect more conflict rather than less over the next four years.

Londoners, including the media, better get used to it.

December 6/18

Reflections on attempts to ban “Baby, It’s Outside”

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(CNN) Star 102, WDOK-FM, calls itself “Cleveland’s Christmas station.” But its listeners are discovering that one holiday chestnut has been kicked to the curb.

“Baby, It’s Cold Outside,” the duet in which a man tries to dissuade a woman from leaving a party despite her repeated protestations, has been pulled from the station’s Christmas playlist amid concerns about its predatory nature.

Penned by “Guys and Dolls” writer Frank Loesser in 1944, the Christmas song is perceived by some as unworthy for the most wonderful time of the year — particularly in the age of #MeToo.

“People might say, ‘Oh, enough with that #MeToo,’ but if you really put that aside and read the lyrics, it’s not something that I would want my daughter to be in that kind of situation,” midday host Desiray told CNN affiliate WJW-TV.

“The tune might be catchy, but let’s maybe not promote that sort of an idea.”

(Source: https://www.cnn.com/2018/12/01/us/baby-its-cold-outside-cleveland-radio-trnd/index.html)

When I first read this on Facebook, I thought it was either a hoax/gag or a publicity stunt on the part of the radio station to draw attention to itself.

But no, it’s on the level.

Apparently, some people including listeners of Star 102, think that this old holiday chestnut offends modern #MeToo sensitivities and is not appropriate for this day and age.

Other more vociferous detractors have labelled it a “Date-Rape Anthem.”

“Date-Rape Anthem?”

Seriously?

Just look at the lyrics they say.

Okay, let’s look at them:

I really can’t stay (Baby it’s cold outside)

I gotta go away (Baby it’s cold outside)

This evening has been (Been hoping that you’d dropped in)

So very nice (I’ll hold your hands they’re just like ice)

My mother will start to worry (Beautiful what’s your hurry?)

My father will be pacing the floor (Listen to the fireplace roar)

So really I’d better scurry (Beautiful please don’t hurry)

Well maybe just a half a drink more (I’ll put some records on while I pour)

The neighbors might think (Baby it’s bad out there)

Say what’s in this drink? (No cabs to be had out there)

I wish I knew how (Your eyes are like starlight now)

To break this spell (I’ll take your hat, your hair looks swell) (Why thank you)

I ought to say no, no, no sir (Mind if move in closer?)

At least I’m gonna say that I tried (What’s the sense of hurtin’ my pride?)

I really can’t stay (Baby don’t hold out)

Baby it’s cold outside

Ah, you’re very pushy you know?

I like to think of it as opportunistic

I simply must go (Baby it’s cold outside)

The answer is no (But baby it’s cold outside)

The welcome has been (How lucky that you dropped in)

So nice and warm (Look out the window at that storm)

My sister will be suspicious (Gosh your lips look delicious!)

My brother will be there at the door (Waves upon a tropical shore)

My maiden aunt’s mind is vicious (Gosh your lips are delicious!)

Well maybe just a cigarette more (Never such a blizzard before) (And I don’t even smoke)

I’ve got to get home (Baby you’ll freeze out there)

Say lend me a coat? (It’s up to your knees out there!)

You’ve really been grand, (I feel when I touch your hand)

But don’t you see? (How can you do this thing to me?)

There’s bound to be talk tomorrow (Think of my life long sorrow!)

At least there will be plenty implied (If you caught pneumonia and died!)

I really can’t stay (Get over that old out)

Baby it’s cold

Baby it’s cold outside

Okay fine, just another drink then

That took a lot of convincing!

According to its detractors, some of the troublesome lyrics spoken by the female include: “My mother will start to worry,” “My father will be pacing the floor,” “Say, what’s in this drink?” and “I ought to say no, no, no, sir.”

Her male counterpart responds with: “Mind if I move a little closer?” “What’s the sense in hurting my pride?” and “Baby, don’t hold out.”

A little historical context here, if you please.

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The song first appeared in the 1948 movie, Neptune’s Daughter, and it was sung by Esther Williams and Ricardo Montalbán in the traditional call and response format, and later in the film by Betty Garrett and Red Skelton in a reversal of gender roles with Garrett being the caller. It was perceived as playful, flirtatious and a bit naughty by audiences at the time, which is certainly the spirit in which it was written by composer Frank Loesser. Its popularity won its composer an Academy Award for Best Original Song in 1949.

(Watch the original rendition of the song here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fRGZULIkfwE)

However, by the 2000s, some people began suggesting that what they were listening to sounded a little too much like sexual coercion and date-rape on the part of male caller.

With the viral spread of the #MeToo movement in 2017, criticism of the song’s lyrics renewed with claims that the man may have spiked the woman’s drink and wouldn’t take no for answer when the female didn’t immediately acquiesce to staying.

One social media post even likened the song’s lyrics to some of the things said by Hollywood producer and accused sexual harasser Harvey Weinstein in an audiotape made public by one of his accusers.

Let’s take pause here.

I guess if one approaches “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” with a predetermined, jaundiced eye, the lyrics could possibly be dissected and interpreted to imply sexual entrapment.

But, indeed, if that’s the case with this silly old song, just imagine if the same “analytical” lens was turned on songs of the Rock era! That would entail a lot of expunging of the radio airwaves.

But I digress.

What concerns me most in this whole debate is the role played by historical revisionism,  defined here as the call to change, remove or erase personalities, events and objects from our collective past in order to reflect contemporary changes in a community’s values and sensitivities.

Originally intended for Loesser and his wife to perform at private parties, “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” evokes a bygone era when gender politics, if they were brought up at all, were considered humorous and provided the material for many stand-up comedy routines like Henny Youngman’s, the American comedian and violinist famous for his best known one-liner “Take my wife … please.”

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With reference to the spiked drink claim, “Say, what’s in this drink?” was a well-known phrase commonly used in movies of the time period and it generally referred to someone saying or doing something they thought they wouldn’t in normal circumstances. It was a nod to the idea that alcohol may make them do something unusual. But the joke was almost always that there is nothing in the drink. The drink is simply the excuse. Today, the question has much darker connotations.

In short, the song is a product of his age.

For close to 70 years “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” was considered no more controversial than other old secular holiday chestnuts like “Here Comes Santa Claus” and “Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer.” Numerous artists, including Ray Charles and Betty Carter, Pearl Bailey and Hot Lips Page, Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Jordan, Steve Lawrence and Eydie Gorme, Rod Stewart and Dolly Parton, Holly Cole and Ed Robertson (of the Barenaked Ladies), Michael Bublé and Anne Murray, and even Lady Gaga and Joseph Gordon-Levitt, have recorded the song over the years.

And numerous generations of listeners have enjoyed it.

Other than different artistic interpretations over the years, the song itself hasn’t changed since it was first penned in 1944. No lyrics have been deleted or revised.

What has changed, however, is how some people interpret the song and a vocal segment of society is now attempting to convince the rest of us that we should perceive “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” the same way it does — as an inappropriate song for this day and age.

Now, I don’t think even the most rabid historical revisionist would argue that the song was written about date-rape. Or at least, I hope not.

And, to be frank, I think it is a bit of a stretch to interpret its lyrics today as a so-called Date-Rape Anthem.

Therefore, in my opinion, all calls for its banning from the radio airwaves and holiday canon are unfounded and should be resisted.

Indeed, nobody and nothing is safe from the type of cultural revisionism that never ends. And, at the risk of sounding too alarmist, it is indicative of a slippery slope to a 1984 Orwellian type of world where he who controls the past controls the present, and he who controls the present controls the future.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to listen to Holly Cole and Ed Roberston perform ‘Baby, It’s Cold Outside” on Cole’s 2001 album.

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December 3, 2018

Note to Gordon Lightfoot – It’s time to hang ’em up

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Overheard at Saturday’s Gordon Lightfoot concert at Budweiser Gardens: “Oh my God, he’s so old!”

I don’t think the young woman who said this comment about the 80-year-old octogenarian troubadour as he returned to the stage for one encore meant it as a disparaging description of the Canadian music legend’s talent as a singer/songwriter.

She was just expressing what many people in the audience – including this writer – were thinking: Mr. Lightfoot is simply too old and too tired to be touring and performing anymore.

Meanwhile, the Rolling Stones – all of whom are pushing 80 – have just announced a 13-show US stadium tour in 2019.  Seriously, does the world really need another Stones tour?

For many people, the image of 75-year-old Mick Jagger prancing around the stage belting out “I can’t get no Satisfaction” like it’s 1969 is just too much to stomach.

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I came of age in the 1960s and was lucky enough to see many of the decade’s rock legends in their prime – including the Stones, Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Deep Purple, Santana, Sly and the Family Stone, Neil Young, The Who, Johnny Winter, James Brown, Bob Dylan,  The Amboy Dukes, The Rascals, Jeff Beck, Eric Clapton, The Righteous Brothers, Frank Zappa, The Turtles, and Chuck Berry, just to name a few.

Some of these artists, unfortunately, didn’t make it past the 1970s, succumbing to substance abuse and other inner demons. Some went on to become multi-millionaire super stars touring the world and living in the kind of luxury they could only dream of in their youth. Some have become parodies of themselves relegated to playing nostalgia shows, and some have completely fallen off the musical radar. Some, probably the minority,  are still composing and recording relevant music and performing to appreciative audiences in 2018.

As Neil Young (himself getting a bit long in the tooth at 73) suggested in his seminal song Hey, Hey, My, My (IntoThe Black): “It’s better to burn out than to fade away.”

Perhaps for some ageing musicians, it’s best to know when it’s time to hang ’em up.

This brings me back to Lightfoot’s concert last Saturday.

It’s not that he didn’t entertain the audience. He did.

It’s not that he didn’t play many of the hits off of his 30 albums of original compositions. He did.

It’s not that he didn’t have a talented backup band. He did.

And, it’s not that the audience didn’t show its appreciation with extended applause and a standing ovation. It did.

But only a completely tone-deaf patron would not have been able to discern that Lightfoot struggled with some of the arrangements, unable to hit higher notes and singing almost unintelligible lyrics at times. It was also obvious that he didn’t perform some of his more challenging compositions.

Indeed, as my companion Val Cavalini, a long-time Lightfoot fan going back to the mid-1960s, suggested: He was a pale imitation of himself in his prime and I would have preferred to listen to a couple of his albums at home with a glass of wine in my hand.

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I feel bad because I talked her into going as I thought it might be the last chance to hear the musical icon live before he either retires or, God forbids, passes away.

I hope those around him, whom he acknowledged from the stage on Saturday, will huddle with Gordon after this tour and advise him to call it a career, leaving his indisputable musical legacy intact.

Please don’t hate me for suggesting this.

November 26, 2018

 

 

 

 

No Mr. Trudeau, I don’t want Statistics Canada accessing my personal banking information

News that Statistics Canada is asking the country’s nine largest banks for the transaction data of 500,000 randomly chosen Canadians, including everything from bill payments to cash withdrawals from ATMs to credit card payments and even account balances, got buried by events transpiring elsewhere in the world.

The government has said it has the legal authority to do so — even without informing Canadians or getting their consent — in order to build a personal information data bank to analyze things like consumer trends and spending habits.

Conservative House Leader Candice Bergen grilled Prime Minister Justin Trudeau about the request during question period Monday following the Global News report that revealed it. [Note: I am not a Conservative. IMHO, this is a non-partisan issue.]

Surprisingly, Trudeau defended the request, claiming that “High quality and timely data are critical to ensuring that government programs remain relevant and effective for Canadians,” adding that his government would ensure that all personal information would be protected and be used for statistical purposes only.

Say what?

In these days of almost daily Internet privacy breaches, who in their right mind – let alone the country’s PM – would willingly offer up their banking information to a third-party?

All that’s missing here is a robo-call  asking Canadians for their Credit Card and Access Card information.

Statistics Canada has said that once the data is compiled by the agency it will be made anonymous in order to remove personal identifiers saying it hopes to have the initiative up and running by January 2019.

Despite Trudeau’s reassurance, readers may remember that Statistics Canada lost nearly 600 sensitive files during the 2016 census process after confidential documents were left on a subway and hundreds were lost after an employee’s car was stolen.

Not exactly comforting news.

Surely, Canadians will vocalize their opposition to this unacceptable intrusion into their financial transactions.

 

 

A Star Is Born is a pleasant surprise

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Because I’m old enough to remember the embarrassingly bad 1976 Barbra Streisand/Kris Kristofferson version of A Star Is Born, I was in no particular hurry to see the new one. Thankfully, I was pleasantly surprised when I went to see it on Saturday with Val Cavalini.

Lady Gaga (Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta) and Bradley Cooper have great screen chemistry as the two star-crossed lovers and the soundtrack is great.

Sure, it’s a schlocky cliched love story, but in these days of hate-filled world leaders, acts of terrorism and Fascist creep, it’s a great way to spend a couple of hours in a darkened theatre.

Oh, by the way, bring some Kleenex. It’s a real tearjerker.

Here’s the tune that’s likely to be an Oscar contender next Spring.

October 22 can’t come soon enough for me

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I don’t know about you, but I can’t wait for October 22 to come so this divisive municipal election campaign can finally be over.

I’m tired of the acronym BRT and all it represents.

I’m tired of BRT sucking up all the time, while other issues like poverty and homelessness take a backseat.

I’m tired of hearing the adjective “transformational.”

I’m tired of hearing some Mayoral candidates arguing over who has the most impressive business background and employment history, as if these were major prerequisites for the position.

I’m tired of hearing Paul Cheng’s godawful radio spot “Cheng for Change.”

I tired of hearing about election sign vandalism, phoney websites targeting female candidates, mysterious PR firms and election slates, and seemingly endless candidates’ meetings.

I’m tired of reading articles about how Ranked Balloting works and how it might impact the results of the October 22 election results.

But, more than anything else, I’m alarmed about how this election campaign has divided Londoners on the basis of class and income, age, place of residence and perceptions of the city past and present.

There may have been more acrimonious municipal election campaigns in London’s political history, but none that I can remember during my years voting  (1972 to present).

My major fear is that this campaign has turned off voters and may result in a poor turnout at the polls on October 22. This could be the worst outcome given the important issues at hand.

So, I can’t wait to cast my ranked ballot on October 22.

I hope you feel the same.